Posted: 08/16/2000

The Replacements

(2000)

by Wayne Case

Why would a bunch of talented actors take on such an obviously low-brow project?

Fair Warning:
Cutting right to the chase, The Replacements is a bad movie. Many theatres that opened it on its August 2000 North American release date will be looking to replace it quickly. Technical elements are marginally incompetent. It is also silly, disjointed, and repetitious. Don’t blame the cast, but excluding them, I can’t think of a single good thing to say about this mess.

Although there’s enough blame to go around, my guess is the director, Howard Deutch, is the main culprit. The buck stops with the captain of a ship; the buck stops with the director of a film, generally. Consider some of Mr. Deutch’s prior efforts. His debut, Pretty In Pink (1986) was written by John Hughes and starred Molly Ringwald; it isn’t bad. In 1988, The Great Outdoors featuring Dan Aykroyd and John Candy, director Deutch’s limitations were apparent. He spent several of the next few years doing television. 1994 brought the forgettable, Getting Even With Dad, which starred Macaulay Culkin and Ted Danson. It was followed by two dismal sequels, Grumpier Old Men (1995) and The Odd Couple II (1998). (Mr. Deutch was not involved with either Grumpy Old Men or The Odd Couple.) Based on this track record, I find it amazing that he was hired to direct The Replacements. He must work cheap and/or fast.

The plot is based on the professional football players’ 1987 strike against the National Football League. As far as I know, this is the first, and hopefully the only, union-busting comedy about this subject. Coach McGinty, as played by Gene Hackman (Hoosiers, The French Connection and over seventy more) must put together a team from leftovers and misfits. He convinces Keanu Reeves, as Shane Falco, to return to football as his quarterback and the balance of the team is comprised of has-beens and criminals. This film isn’t going to damage Mr. Reeves’ career, but he has appeared in several much better films such as Speed, The Matrix, and My Own Private Idaho. He also made his share of other bad films including Chain Reaction and Johnny Mnemonic. I found leading lady efforts by Brooke Langton pleasant enough but was never quite sure why she was a cheerleader either before or during the strike.

Cinematography, editing, and sound are barely adequate and the entire production looks cheap. There are several strange edits, and the should-be-background music is way too prominent. Further, although I love Gloria Gaynor’s seventies hit recording of “I Will Survive,” that or the Diana Ross recording of “Ain’t No Mountain High Enough” seem to pop up in every second film released these days. Having the football team line dance to “I Will Survive” in a locker room was painful.

Unless you simply must see every film that Keanu Reeves or Gene Hackman makes, I cannot recommend this. To me, this all feels very desperate. For example, during the rather flat football game sequences, there are far too many cutaways to the substitute cheerleaders doing their silly thing on the sidelines. No one is going to confuse this football game footage with the dazzling work in Any Given Sunday. This films idea of humor is to have placekicker, Rhys Ifans from Notting Hill, smoking even while he is in the middle of the field during the games.

If you are in the mood for a football comedy, look for North Dallas Forty or The Longest Yard at your local video store. Finally, regarding The Replacements, in a word: PASS.

Wayne Case works in the film industry in Hollywood, and still can’t help himself — he loves the movies.

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