Posted: 12/02/2003

The Haunted Mansion

(2003)

by Hank Yuloff

Murphy’s latest not as scary as his last attempt. Thank goodness.

Walt Disney Studios continues its trip around Disneyland with the fourth movie based on a ride at the famous amusement park to come out since 1998.* Like the earlier 2003 release, Pirates of the Caribbean, The Haunted Mansion is a story with the same name as the namesake ride that doesn’t have anything to do with the movie, but is filled with enough references to the former E-ticket attractions to keep you constantly looking for them.

Eddie Murphy (48 Hours, Beverly Hills Cop) and Marsha Thomason (Las Vegas TV, Black Knight) star as Jim and Sara Evers, a married couple who are real estate agents. Sara receives a mysterious phone call asking them to represent the selling of a mansion in the swamps of Louisiana. On their way to a family weekend away, they stop at the house and quickly learn that all is not right. The house is “occupied” by Master Ghracey (Nathanial Parker from UK TV’s Inspector Lynley Mysteries) and is run by his butler Ramsley (Terence Stamp from The Limey) and two servants Ezra (Wallace Shawn from Princess Bride and Duplex) and Emma (Dina Sypbey—Freaky Friday). You’ve probably guessed and we learn quickly, that they are all ghosts. We also find that there is a specific reason that their is interest in Sara Evers.

For the fans of the ride, there are several dozen references to the Haunted Mansion attraction. The first words we hear are “Welcome Foolish Mortals.” We see the famous body hanging from the attic rafters and hear the immortal expression to leave somewhere without doors or windows: “Of course, there’s always my way.” Eddie Murphy takes a walk down the hallway with the paintings of subjects that change from living to dead, which leads to the busts with eyes that follow you when you move past them. I’m also pretty sure I saw the staircase where I made out with Karen Fisher the time the ride broke down on my 12th birthday. Speaking of wanting to make out, Jennifer Tilly (Stuart Little, Bound) plays Madame Leota, the disembodied spirit trapped in a crystal ball. She and the Evers’ daughter Megan (Aree Davis) get the best lines in the movie. Along with the famous hitchhiking ghosts are references to The Sixth Sense, Young Frankenstein (“Wow, what knockers”), and the Wizard of Oz.

The Haunted Mansion moves along at a quick enough pace to keep it interesting and the folks at Disney did a great job of set decoration. Lots of eye candy. The ghosts are familiar and fun to watch. I think it is good enough to see in the theater and definitely worth the rental in a few months.

While I think The Haunted Mansion isn’t for the very little kids, there were dozens of them in the audience. There are lots of scary zombies that might have been very scary, though I thought it was more like a flashback to the Thriller video. It’s a good beginner scary movie for the younger set but you should see it with them. Or just go on the ride yourself.

(*Swiss Family Robinson, Country Bears, Pirates, Haunted Mansion).

Hank Yuloff is an expert at where to make out at Disneyland out of the sight of prying security cameras.

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