Posted: 07/11/2006

Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest

(2006)

by Hank Yuloff

Lots of action.

Some humor.

A little bit of flirtatious banter.

A several sided story with many villains and heroes.

A tip of the Disney mouse ear cap to the ride that spawned the series.

Yea, Pirates of the Caribbean is a wonderful summer popcorn flick. In this second installment, Captain Jack Sparrow (Johnny Depp) is a little off his game. His compass that points to whatever he wants the most is not obeying him… It could be because he does not know what he wants, or he is split in going the good guy route, or back to the pirate ways. Also, it is time for Jack to pay a 30-year unpaid debt Davy Jones and his army of sea-phantoms…his soul. Now, he must find a way to save himself from becoming one of them, and losing his captaincy of the Black Pearl as well as his life.

A good flick… But jeez… Did anyone see what time it is? This thing is going on a bit long, eh? Yea… This battle scene with X and Z all fighting over the Chest (see the title of the movie) that contains something that could set Jack free is into its 10th minute now. Just because you have some good ideas on what could happen in a scene, does not mean we need to see ALL of them. And come to think of it, most all of the battle scenes run to, shall we say, the longish end of interest.

I like a good swashbuckler as much as the next fellow, but I think that Douglas Fairbanks (Robin Hood 1922) and Errol Flynn (Captain Blood, 1935, Robin Hood 1938) and even Dustin Hoffman (Hook 1991) got it done in less time with a bit more pizzazz. And don’t get me started on the scene where they are getting away from the island tribe. It started to remind me of King Kong, without the interesting effects.

Yea, I am commenting on a film that opened to almost $140 million, but I guess would have been fine if I only got 135 or so minutes instead of 150.

The acting is quite fine. Depp (Finding Netherland, Blow) is perfect in his Sparrow / Keith Richards character. And Orlando Bloom (Troy, Kingdom of Heaven) as William Turner is a worthy second in line for credit. I would liken him to a good number 6 place hitter with a .285 batting average and 20 home runs a year. Steady, you would think twice of replacing him, but you could still find someone else for the position. Keira Knightley returns also as love interest Elizabeth Swann. I loved her in Domino last year but thought she looked… I don’t know… A bit thin in this movie.

Just because you will not be able to recognize him, Davey Jones (not from the Monkees, the SEA) is played by Bill Nighy—the old rock and roller from Love Actually and the lead in The Girl in the Cafe (from 2005). He does a great job acting with what must be twenty pounds of YUCK on his head.

The review that I post for this film really won’t matter. You have seen the trailers. It’s a thrill every couple of minutes and a joke every OTHER minute kind of film. And its a lot of fun. Like the last film, if you want a preview into the third installment due out next year, stay in your seat until the end of the credits.

Hank Yuloff is a film critic living in Encino, California.

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