Posted: 01/18/2008

He Was a Quiet Man

(2007)

by D. B. Bates

He Was a Quiet Man has one of the most interesting premises I’ve ever seen in a movie. It takes a cubicle drone, who is unhinged because he’s so lonely he talks to his fish (who talks back, but we’ll get to that), and allows him to fall in love…which makes him more unhinged. That is the journey Christian Slater’s Bob Maconel takes. It’s Slater’s finest performance, and an exceptional calling card to declare that he’s back, and he’s capable—and yes, he should reclaim his A-list status. The movie is good, but it doesn’t quite live up to the performance.

The setup for Bob’s love story is appropriately twisted. He’s a sad sack—no friends, no respect at work, apparently no family. His neighbors only talk to him when they want him to “do something about that lawn.” His only friend is a fish, who he thinks talk to him. It’s clear he doesn’t—even the fish admits that he sees everything Bob sees and nothing else. It allows us to learn about Bob’s subconscious without torturing us with long voiceovers.

But it’s clear Bob needs a hobby; unfortunately, he has one—toiling away on fake bombs. He has a ritual of loading a gun, assigning each bullet to an obnoxious coworker, except the last one—that one’s for him, if he ever had the guts to start shooting. Then comes the day when he drops the last bullet, and as he reaches under his cubicle to pick it up…somebody else starts shooting.

When he discovers the shooter has accidentally shot his crush, Vanessa (Elisha Cuthbert), Bob Maconel the potential shooter accidentally becomes Bob Maconel the hero. He’s rewarded with a new executive job, some respect at the office, extra money—but it’s not what he want. He saved Vanessa’s life, but she’s paralyzed from the neck down. He wants her, so when she asks him to finish the job, he has no idea what to do.

What follows is a love story as twisted an uncomfortable as its setting. He Was a Quiet Man toes the line between bleak (but mostly funny) corporate satire and uncomfortable, sad-sack drama. It’s like The Office with guns. Sometimes the tonal shifts are a little jarring, but it didn’t crush my suspension of disbelief. As Vanessa makes Bob realize his biggest problem is fear rather than loneliness, and he finally gets the confidence to do something about it, it leads him down a path that is as unfortunate as it is inevitable.

Both Christian Slater and Elisha Cuthbert give impressive performances. I’ve always been a fan of Slater, but when he resorted to working with Uwe Boll I felt like all was lost. It’s good to see him play a role worthy of his talents. Cuthbert, on the other hand, is someone I’ve only seen on 24, and while she did well with the rebellious-teen stuff in the first season, “adult Kim Bauer” was not her finest work. Based on her nuanced, tragic performance here, I’ll go ahead and blame that on 24’s weak writing. William H. Macy is underused but typically awesome as the slimy head of Bob’s company, a man who once had a fling with Vanessa (his former personal assistant). A supporting cast of mostly unknowns do a solid job of rounding out a corporate environment of shallow jackasses.

The ending gets a little overly existential and weird—in fact, so existential and weird that it kind of rips off Camus’s The Stranger—but writer/director Frank A. Cappello is on the right track. It’s not a perfect film, but it’s a good film. Cappello clearly has an interesting visual flair, but sometimes it’s a little too much flair. Certain sections feel a bit over-directed, with the swinging camera and quirky trick photography. It makes some scenes, like Bob and Vanessa’s awkward but hilarious karaoke experience, feel stagnant because the camera isn’t whooshing around all over the place. Even so, a director having the ability to exhibit such interesting work on what I assume is a modest budget gets points from me, even if he overdoes it.

He Was a Quiet Man has its flaws, but it’s an enjoyable experience well worth seeking out. I just wish it were getting a more publicized release so more people would get the chance to see it. Fortunately, it’s available on DVD, so you can find it for rent or purchase pretty much everywhere. Check it out.

D. B. Bates is a writer and film critic who once fell in love with a quadriplegic. It didn’t end well for either of us.

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