Posted: 11/20/2002

Formula 51

(2002)

by Laura Abraham

See Samuel L. Jackson in a kilt! Watch a director rip-off a classic! Be amazed when you realize you’ve just wasted $8! At last, a film that’s more fun than poking a few thousand needles in your eyes!

Someone has been watching Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels too much and that person is Ronny Yu. Yu’s latest directorial endeavor left me unsure whether to laugh or be pissed off and ask for my money back. A man such as Yu, who makes good Hong Kong action films should know how to make a great American action film, however I am sorry to report that he does not.

Now believe me when I write I have no problem with directors getting inspiration from other filmmakers or film movements for example, the obvious Bollywood influence in Moulin Rouge. Or, I can even appreciate when taken even further there seems to be a direct rip-off such as when Tarantino impolitely refused to acknowledge the importance of Hong Kong cinema on his cult hit, Reservoir Dogs. Moulin Rouge and Reservoir Dogs are a nod to movies before them, movies that had such impact on these directors newer films were created in their wake.

Formula 51 is not a nod to Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels, or Monty Python it is more of a big, steaming hot piss on them. A general fuck you to them, since it really has NO idea what it is or where it comes from. On the other hand, Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels knew itself very, very well. I wasn’t sure if I should laugh because it was so blindingly contrived, but since no one in the audience was laughing I decided to wait until I could publicly rip it apart in Film Monthly.

The film begins with Elmo McElroy (Samuel L. Jackson) getting busted for pot while wearing a ridiculous afro wig. I think this scene with the wig is familiar to me, but I can’t place it…oh wait yes I can, ALMOST ALL Samuel L. Jackson movies have him in an afro wig. Yawn, how original. The one stupid act of having been busted for pot, discredits him such that his newly acquired degree in chemistry is rendered useless in the job market. Cut ahead 20 years and he is sans wig making drugs for the local kingpin, The Lizard (Meatloaf ). Yes, there is a character named The Lizard, and yes he is played by a person named Meatloaf (Eddie in Rocky Horror Picture Show).

Elmo decides to screw The Lizard over and kills him by blowing up the lab and taking off for good ole England. Here he hopes to sell his creation, a drug 51 times stronger than cocaine, 51 times more hallucinogenic than acid, and 51 times more explosive than ecstasy. Unfortunately The Lizard man is a crafty soul and gets out of the way of the bomb, living to seek revenge on Elmo.

Arriving in Liverpool he is met by Felix DeSousa (Robert Carlslyle—Angela’s Ashes), whom earlier in the film has been shown not to be the nicest or most honest guy in town. Although, Robert Carlyle shot into the American public eye with his startlingly realistic portrayal of the over hostile, angry Begbie in Trainspotting, he is perhaps better known and loved for his portrayal of Hamish McBeth, a pot smoking, foulmouthed yet good natured cop in the Highlands. Carlyle is a great actor, with a lot of screen presence and energy in excess. However, even he couldn’t help this ridiculous rip off and I was even angry with him by the end of it.

I have to say, however the most irritating and ridiculous character in the whole damn movie, is Dakota (Emily Mortimer—Lovely & Amazing), the hired hit-lady by the Lizard. She happens to be the ex girlfriend of Felix as well, which is such a stupid coincidence it made me gag on my bottle of over priced European water available at my fancy multiplex. And, to top it off whenever she was shooting her big gun at people they would show it in slow motion, with her hair swinging and her eyes opened wide and doe like. It was like a fucking Breck commercial and it made me sick.

I was confused by this movie and I don’t like to be confused. Was I supposed to laugh because during the million dollar drug deal the dealer was wearing a kilt and swinging a club instead of a gun like real big boy drug dealers use, or was I supposed to laugh because many of the jokes involved exploding large intestines or was I supposed to be scared because the big bad Lizard man was menacing. I don’t know and no one was there to explain it.

I’m not even going to discuss the stupidity of putting Jackson in a kilt for the whole film. I’m not discussing it because every other reviewer cannot stop focusing on this. They act like they can’t figure out why the director did it. It’s so obviously to keep focus away from the real problems such as lack of story, lack of character development, lack of comedy, lack of bowel control. It is so obvious I swear you can’t make me discuss it. So there.

Laura Abraham is a freelance living in Ann Arbor, Michigan, which is about 20 minutes outside Detroit.

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