Posted: 11/20/2000

Charlie’s Angels

(2000)

by Hank Yuloff

Hello, Angels!

When I first saw the trailer for Charlie’s Angels last year, my first thought was: It’s gonna really suck or it’s going to be incredible. Then, during the intervening months we heard rumors of problems on theset: the stars weren’t getting along, the story needed work, etc. and I got that Blair Witch Project feeling all over again. Well, the movie came out and here it is:

CHARLIE’S ANGELS ROCKS!!!!!!

Yes, baby, here is ONE movie made from a TV show that I can really say I LOVED!

Basic story: Three highly intelligent, combat ready, beautiful women (Cameron Diaz, Drew Barrymore, Lucy Liu) are hired by a reclusive millionaire to form an elite private investigating firm. Their current client, Sam Rockwell (Galaxy Quest, The Green Mile) has been kidnapped and his voice mapping softwear has been stolen by a bad guy, Tim Curry (Sorry, the guy has 90 acting credits, but I still see him as Dr. Frank-N-Furter, as does the Internet Data Base which shows him in drag next to his bio) who will use it to be able to find anyone, anywhere: it is the end of privacy. The Angel’s job: find the kidnapped client, kick the bad guy’s ass, and get the softwear back.

Basic review:
The top 12 reasons to go see Charlie’s Angels:

12. The James Bond movie-type opening. Just like the (James Bond author) Ian Fleming stories, the first few minutes are just an introduction to the Angel’s abilities and has nothing to do with the rest of the movie, but it is total action.

11. No Opening Credits. This let first-time director Joseph McGinty Nichol get right into the story. Never heard of Nichol? This was his first credit: Great call by the producers.

10. Bill Murray as Bosley. They could have let him go a little more, but as with every part he takes, he makes a movie better. He was a better Bosley than David Doyle. Which reminds me…

9. They got John Forsythe to return as the voice of Charlie, as he did with the TV show of the 70’s. This along with a comment in the opening few minutes about making TV shows into movies was a great homage to the original. Which leads us to…

8. I never once missed Farrah, Jaclyn, nor Kate. In most Made-From-TV-show movies, you tend to constantly compare the new and oldversions. Remember the Brady Bunch? Or McHale’s Navy? You kept seeing theoriginal characters in the new ones. With this version of Charlie’s Angels, the women are left to develop their characters with no ties to the originals. They didn’t even use the same names. Along those same lines, I can see the ‘Old’ Star Trek vs. ‘New’ Star Trek analogy coming into play with the Angels: Who would win, the new ones or the originals? Well, unlike Captain Kirk, who would kick Jean Luc’s ass, the current Angels would definitely win.

7. The Sound Track. If you grew up when the TV show was popular, there’s some great nostalgia. But if you’re under 30, there is enough currentmusic to make for great backround. Best use of music: “Smack My Bitch Up” used during a fight sequence between the Angels and Crispen Glover. Speaking of which…

6. Crispen Glover is ONE SICK FUCK. This guy plays the demented freak in every movie I’ve seen him in, and this is no exception. He has no lines, but you can tell that this guy’s parents used him as their punching bag.

5. Lucy Liu takes Ling (from Ally McBeal) and shows us what she would be like if she was a nice person.

4. The Fight Sequences. It’s The Matrix meets John Woo’s M:I2. They are KILLER. This is the MTV Award for the year in this category. Diaz, Barrymore and Liu totally kick butt and take names.

3. Drew Barrymore telling 5 guys exactly how she is going to beat the crap out of them and watching her do it.

2. Cameron Diaz in a white body suit. My God! Actually, the clothes they put these women into are going to be enough to cause teen age boys to make the DVD a best seller.

1. The movie is played for laughs by taking itself seriously. They played it straight, and we believed they were the super women of 2000.

Mark this one down as going in my Top 10 List for the year.

Hank Yuloff is an entertainment industry entrepreneur living in Hollywood. He used to watch a lot of TV. Okay, too much TV.

Got a problem? E-mail us at filmmonthly@gmail.com