I Drink Your Blood
by Gary Schultz
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“Let it be known, sons and daughters, that Satan was an acidhead! Drink from this cup, cleanse yourselves, and together we’ll all freak out!” That’s how the cult classic B-movie I Drink your Blood begins. A group of homeless devil-worshipping longhairs infiltrate an abandoned mining town and take over a rat-infested farmhouse for the night after their van breaks down a few miles outside of town. Their partying gets out of hand, causing an old man to go to the house and try to calm the commotion down. They throw him around a little, stuff LSD down his throat, and send him back home to his grandchildren. The old man trips his ass off in the kitchen much to the horror of his family. His vengeful grade-school grandson kills a rabid dog, drains its blood and injects it into a batch of meat pies that are sold to the starving devil worshippers who are sick of eating meat pies. Everyone that eats the meat pies gets rabies and goes crazy. They start frothing at the mouth, which looks more like toothpaste than anything else. A power struggle ensues between the leader of the Satanists and one of the other members of the group. A couple of horny construction workers jump one of the hippie chicks and end up getting rabies too. Soon half the abandoned town is infected, (there were only like five people left in the town anyway), and the normal people are being chased all over by a gang of drooling devil hippies.
I Drink Your Blood is one of those cult classic seventies films that has a low budget-late sixties-early seventies vibe that makes me absolutely love the seventies horror genre. Don’t get me wrong, I Drink Your Blood isn’t really even a very good film but it has that style… the funky poor music, the actresses with long seventies style straight hair down to their waists who aren’t afraid to go topless and the cheesy villains that are usually just other “normal” people gone mad. I love seventies horror. This film was originally released in 1970 and is now being re-released by MTI Home Video. I Drink Your Blood features many young non-actors that didn’t really do anything else with the exception of Lynn Lowry who starred in Lloyd Kaufman’s first three films and George Romero’s cult classic The Crazies but she’s not even credited in this film. The acting is poor. The story line is well, all over the place. There are several memorable scenes like Grandpa tripping on LSD in the kitchen, young Petey injecting rabid blood into meat pies. The Dragon Lady sets herself on fire and there’s a decent decapitation. All in all I Drink Your Blood is bad film for bad film lovers. Any cult film fan should see this film.
So here’s what we’ve learned so far…hippies can be Satanists. Who still eats meat pies? Actually who has ever eaten meat pies? What was up with the town in this movie? It was like Children of the Corn only without the corn and religion. Where’s the mayor, the fire department? How do they even get clean water? How is it that these Satanists can’t afford a home or a change of clothes but can still get good acid? I don’t know.
Gary Schultz is an indie filmmaker in Chicago.
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