Shorts

Short Takes – September 2006

Short Takes – September 2006

| September 1, 2006 | 0 Comments

Television Good news, the Emmys weren’t boring this year. With lively host Conan O’Brien singing a bit about NBC’s falling ratings entitled “We’re Screwed,” how could it possibly be boring? Kiefer Sutherland finally takes home the gold after five years of nominations, and 24 itself won for Best Drama. Perhaps he’ll stop drinking long enough […]

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Short Takes – August 2006

Short Takes – August 2006

| August 1, 2006 | 0 Comments

Television The Emmy nominees were announced last week. Leading the pack are fan favorites 24 and Grey’s Anatomy. Both Lost and Desperate Housewives–who have dominated the Emmys for the past two years–were both shut out of all major awards. Not one stupid whore from Housewives got nominated. Could this mean I’m actually going to enjoy […]

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Short Takes – July 2006

Short Takes – July 2006

| July 1, 2006 | 0 Comments

Television Blade: The Series, a watered down version of the popular films (based on a comic no one read) premiered on Spike TV Wednesday night with surprisingly high numbers. The two-hour premiere pulled in 2.5 million viewers, which sets the record for highest-rated series ever for the network. Its also the only Spike TV series […]

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Short Takes – June 2006

Short Takes – June 2006

| June 1, 2006 | 0 Comments

Television In the American Idol finale, Jay Leno duked it out with the stupid whore and won. Was there ever any doubt that Taylor Hicks would lose to total phony Katharine McPhee in the end? You bet your ass there was! But more importantly, why does Taylor’s dad look ten years younger than he does? […]

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Short Takes – May 2006

Short Takes – May 2006

| May 1, 2006 | 0 Comments

Television The producers of ER have finally lost their minds. After years of making terrible casting decisions, this one takes the cake. John Stamos, who did a brief stint as a boring paramedic on the show, will be joining the cast as a regular next season. So let me get this straight. Stamos appears for […]

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Short Takes – April 2006

Short Takes – April 2006

| April 1, 2006

Television The body count just keeps on rising in the 24 universe. Within the past two hours alone, fans watched a total of four main characters fall to the ground lifelessly, one of them being fan favorite Tony Almeida, the only regular to remain on the show since the first season (besides Kiefer). In other […]

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Short Takes – March 2006

Short Takes – March 2006

| March 1, 2006 | 0 Comments

Television ABC’s hit The Bachelor ended this week, with boring Nashville doctor Travis picking the Nashville Kindergarten teacher Sarah. I guess it helps when you live in the same hometown so you can sneak around during breaks of filming in Paris. But Sarah wasn’t the only one spotted with Travis around Music City. At least […]

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Short Takes – February 2006

Short Takes – February 2006

| February 1, 2006 | 0 Comments

Television January is turning into the new September for television premieres. FX’s The Shield opened its fifth season four months ahead of schedule, and after months of advertising the appearance of Forest Whitaker, fans of the show were terribly let down as Whitaker portrayed one of the creepiest cop characters in TV history. No, its […]

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Short Takes – December 2005

Short Takes – December 2005

| December 1, 2005 | 0 Comments

Hello, invisible friends. Are you full of holiday spirit? Holiday spirits? Six of one half, dozen of another in my estimation. What are you possibly going to do with yourself during this dark month? Hey! Put down the bottle, pick up the remote control! Television You know what’s good right now? That crazy Christmas stuff. […]

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Short Takes – October 2005

Short Takes – October 2005

| October 1, 2005 | 0 Comments

Oh, boy, I love October. Lair of the Libra and sanctioned costumery. This year I will masquerade myself by wearing a gray turtleneck, braids, and no mascara, which immediately turns me into Andrew Wyeth’s Helga. Man, I think it’s funny, and I can tell who are the right kind of people when they get it. […]

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