Author Archive: yuloff.hank

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Déjà Vu

Déjà Vu

| November 26, 2006

Who knew that the Tony Scott-Denzel Washington combination would be so…awesome? First, we got Man on Fire, and now Déjà Vu, a pulse-pounding thriller of definite originality. Throw in producer Jerry Bruckheimer, and you know stuff is going to blow up. The story starts off with a Bruckheimer trademark, a massive explosion. Doug Carlin (Denzel […]

Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan

Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan

| November 9, 2006 | 0 Comments

Hysterical. Hilarious. Idiotically brilliant. Borat is a comedy unlike anything seen before on the big screen, one that can bring laughter-induced tears. A comedy that lets the viewer in on the secret that none of its supporting characters know about: that Borat is a character brilliantly created by Sacha Baron Cohen. But this isn’t an […]

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Academy Gripe 1: Give Scorsese His Due!

Academy Gripe 1: Give Scorsese His Due!

| October 1, 2006 | 0 Comments

Like many people, I love to watch the Oscars. There is just something magical about a four hour program that lets Hollywood celebrate itself for the entire world to see. But as much as I enjoy the show, there have been some abominational (yes, I made that up) decisions that they have made. And yes […]

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Flyboys

Flyboys

| September 29, 2006 | 0 Comments

Okay, I’ll admit it. I am a sucker for any film that focuses on fighter jets or dogfights, pretty much anything that can attempt to be as badass as Top Gun, one of my all-time favorite flicks. And after watching Flyboys, you do sort of realize how much further action films that take place in […]

Crank

Crank

| September 10, 2006

You’ve been injected with a serum that is slowly poisoning your body, and the only way stay alive is to keep up your adrenaline. Whether it is red bull, cocaine, burning yourself with a waffle iron, or driving a car through a mall, a man has got to do whatever it takes to keep himself […]

Pulse

Pulse

| August 17, 2006 | 0 Comments

Remember the start of the Botox craze in Hollywood, everyone seemed to be shooting themselves up. And now there is the baby craze, babies have become the new Botox. Not to far down the line however is the “lets remake a Japanese horror film but leave everything that out that made the original good” craze. […]

A Scanner Darkly

A Scanner Darkly

| August 1, 2006 | 0 Comments

A Scanner Darkly is a surreal trip into the mind of Philip K. Dick. Inspired by Dick’s own experience with drugs and the numerous deaths of his own friends, the book has been brought to the big screen in excellent fashion. Using the rotoscope technique, the filmed actors have been digitally transformed into a visually […]

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Little Man

Little Man

| July 18, 2006

200 bazooka joes. 40 blow pops. A small box of Depends. Bob the Builder take-along play box. A Rubbermaid Lobby Broom. A tube of Vagisil. A 1-pound box of framing screws. And a short rope to hang myself are some of the many pointless items that I would of rather had then spend 10 dollars […]

Waist Deep

Waist Deep

| July 2, 2006 | 0 Comments

The only piece of information that you need to know about Waist Deep, is that it was directed by the same douche that crapped out Glitter, the film that may be the sole reason for Mariah Carey’s nervous breakdown that lasted several years. The last time Vondie Curtis-Hall found work as a writer and director, […]

The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift

The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift

| June 17, 2006 | 0 Comments

Bad acting. Check. Atrocious Dialogue. Check. Forced subplots. Check. Annoying rapper sidekick. Check. Ridiculously awesome driving scenes. Check. Opening action scene with the older brother from Home Improvement. Check. The best way to describe this unnecessary sequel is a cheesy Karate Kid on wheels. The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift is the third in […]

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